Is email an official addiction? If so, I'm really wondering if I belong in EA. As I go into the New Year, I'm really trying to evaluate my life. And I'm realizing that the quantity of emails in my inbox really does effect me emotionally. And sometimes spiritually. I honestly feel like more than half of my day is spent emailing. And maybe that is normal. But I'm not sure it's entirely healthy.
More specifically, here is what I struggle with. If I have any down time, doesn't matter whether I'm at a red light or in the bath room, I find myself checking my phone to see if I have an email. And if I do, my subconscious response is "I better read and respond as quickly as possible."
That sentence just dislodged an ancient memory. When I was a kid I used to come home for dinner, believe it or not, when my mom rang our dinner bell. Sounds like Leave it to Beaver or Mayberry doesn't it? I'd come home, but I remember saying, "We have to hurry up and eat. My friends are waiting." If I said that once I said it a hundred times. So even at five years-old, I think I was already driven. I don't like to keep people waiting! And on one level, that's respectful and prudent. We actually have a 24-hour rule at NCC. Staff needs to respond to email in a timely fashion.
The problem is this: I can't seem to keep up.
I had a defining moment at the Willowcreek Group Life Conference a few months ago. I turned off my phone when I got up to speak. I turned it back on afterwards and I had 69 new messages. I wish that was an anomaly, but it's not. For some reason, it struck me that day. I was pretty tired from a long fall of traveling and speaking. Basically, I felt like a marathoner around mile 18 who realizes they can't sustain the pace!
Here's my question: how many emails can you answer per day before it begins to consume your life? I think that varies. If you're working on Capitol Hill, it may be several hundred emails. But I think we need to know our threshold.
Two years I set three New Years Resolutions that really helped me maintain my personal boundaries:
1) Use all my vacation days.
2) Don't be away from home more than 30 nights.
3) Don't check work-related email on my day off.
Using all my vacation days has become a way of life. No turning back on that one! And I'm actually reducing the number of days away to 25 in 2009. But I still struggle with the email boundaries. I check it first thing in the morning. I check it last thing at night. And I check it all the time in between.
That's my blog confession. I'm honestly not sure how I manage this. But I know I need to make some changes. I'm thinking about an occasional blog fast. And I'm thinking about reestablishing some blog boundaries around my day off.
Thanks for letting me purge!
More specifically, here is what I struggle with. If I have any down time, doesn't matter whether I'm at a red light or in the bath room, I find myself checking my phone to see if I have an email. And if I do, my subconscious response is "I better read and respond as quickly as possible."
That sentence just dislodged an ancient memory. When I was a kid I used to come home for dinner, believe it or not, when my mom rang our dinner bell. Sounds like Leave it to Beaver or Mayberry doesn't it? I'd come home, but I remember saying, "We have to hurry up and eat. My friends are waiting." If I said that once I said it a hundred times. So even at five years-old, I think I was already driven. I don't like to keep people waiting! And on one level, that's respectful and prudent. We actually have a 24-hour rule at NCC. Staff needs to respond to email in a timely fashion.
The problem is this: I can't seem to keep up.
I had a defining moment at the Willowcreek Group Life Conference a few months ago. I turned off my phone when I got up to speak. I turned it back on afterwards and I had 69 new messages. I wish that was an anomaly, but it's not. For some reason, it struck me that day. I was pretty tired from a long fall of traveling and speaking. Basically, I felt like a marathoner around mile 18 who realizes they can't sustain the pace!
Here's my question: how many emails can you answer per day before it begins to consume your life? I think that varies. If you're working on Capitol Hill, it may be several hundred emails. But I think we need to know our threshold.
Two years I set three New Years Resolutions that really helped me maintain my personal boundaries:
1) Use all my vacation days.
2) Don't be away from home more than 30 nights.
3) Don't check work-related email on my day off.
Using all my vacation days has become a way of life. No turning back on that one! And I'm actually reducing the number of days away to 25 in 2009. But I still struggle with the email boundaries. I check it first thing in the morning. I check it last thing at night. And I check it all the time in between.
That's my blog confession. I'm honestly not sure how I manage this. But I know I need to make some changes. I'm thinking about an occasional blog fast. And I'm thinking about reestablishing some blog boundaries around my day off.
Thanks for letting me purge!
29 Comments:
Confession is good ... now, get your family to keep you accountable. I started by not checking work-related e-mail on my day off and was too tempted, so I don't check it all. "Day off" is a tough one in ministry I am finding out rather quickly, put if you call it your Sabbath day, it's easy to put what you do on that day into perspective.
Are all those emails needing your response or is there someone else (assistant, another staff member, etc) who could answer it?
Yes you're addicted. Yes you need therapy. :)
I have the same problem. All me emails go through my assistant now and she give me one email a day with what I need.
I also took my personal email off of my phone which keeps me from checking it at home and on the weekends.
One email could throw my whole evening off with my family.
Get of the that crack.
I am GUILTY as charged!
Great ideas!
I do have an assitant that helps, but I stuggle with the "impersonal" nature of not personally responding. You know what I mean? Not sure how to get over that :) Maybe by ending up in an asylum?
Mark
One practical thing you could try doing is create a second e-mail for internal use. Leave your known public e-mail for the public, knowing that unfortunately your availability will be limited and delayed in terms of a response, and use your internal e-mail for the stuff that requires your prompt attention. (Just make sure that address doesn't get leaked!)
Good idea Jared, that's exactly what our Lead Pastor does.
I am not addicted to email.
And to that I would like to add...
Oh! Wait! The light is blinking on my Blackberry...I will finish my thought later.
I started fasting from email on Saturdays and it's been a really healthy thing for my soul. Makes you realize how much the tyranny of email feeds our need to feel needed or important. Fasting has been a good reminder that I'm certainly not indispensable and God WILL keep the world spinning without me for a day. :)
Wow - thanks for the confession - I thought I was the only one...... my iPhone gives a little "boing" sound when I get a new email but sometimes I don't hear it so I am always checking......in my bed - first thing in the morning, and in my bed last thing at night......maybe the first thing we need to do is admit that it's become a problem !
As the lead pastor your circle of those who have access to you needs to shrink, that is my opinion. You love people, you really do care I can see that. But you need to help more people care about more people, than being the primary care giver and resource man.
Your assistant, you need to trust to do some responding for you. If its coming from him/her it may as well be coming from you. People will learn that to be true as you allow it to happen.
I too struggle with the notion of Sabbath in an electronic age. Sometimes you need to unplug!
Ecclesiastes 12:12-14 (The Message)
12-13 But regarding anything beyond this, dear friend, go easy. There's no end to the publishing of books, and constant study wears you out so you're no good for anything else. The last and final word is this:
Fear God.
Do what he tells you.
If the Holy Spirit were writing this today He might say , "...there's no end to the internet, and the constant reading of email (or blogs) wears you out so you're no good for anything else..." Just a thought, Pastor Mark. Go to God and ask Him what you should do about your addiction. He will surely tell you.
I was very impressed with the promptness of responses to emails I sent, but like many others, I understand you are very busy and would never offended if a response took a little longer. We know that you need to care for your flock and staff first, they are your priority. Good luck with the balancing act!
merlin mann's zero inbox was really helpful for me.
here he is giving the talk to the google staff
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=973149761529535925
Hi Mark. Welcome to EA. The first step to recovery is admiting that you have a problem.
I'm struggling mightily with this same issue right now as well. The Lord has been impressing on me lately to spend more time in communication with Him (prayer) than with email. To accomplish that I see technology fasting in my future and also prioritizing the email I receive as needs attention, good information or throw away. Another thing is to minimize the amount of e-newsletters. I just unsubscribed from about 20 last week.
I'm pulling for you. We're all in this together.
I'm young enough to not be intimidated by internet technology, and old enough to remember changing the ribbon on my dad's old manual typewriter; using carbon paper; and sending everything by snail mail that was out of reach of a local phone call.
I think the key to life online is brevity and concision. As the volume of e-mails increases, the size of each message decreases.
Another key is not to feel like everything deserves an answer right away. The people in your line of sight are of primary importance; the electronic invaders (including phone calls) are intruders! They have to wait until you're done with those you're dealing with personally.
Another key is not to feel that everything deserves a reply, or that you need to have the last word (because then THEY need to feel they have to have the last word.) If there's any doubt on the part of the sender that you got the message, just hit reply and type, "Got It." Or, "Okay."
Paul, I can tell you that the size of PM's e-mails can't shrink much more :) - which is okay by me!
Your mention of blogging on your day off is something similar to what I wrestle with. It seems that I often spend most of the day in front of the computer blogging, twittering, and doing web design. I enjoy doing all of these things, but sometimes it feels like I've had a day of work rather than a day of rest.
Ouch...it's my day off and I'm checking e-mail and reading blogs. Guess we're living in the same club.
One thing that's helped me is something I gleaned from Shane Hipps book, The Hidden Power of Electronic Culture. He points out that all technology is an extension of your personal sense. So the phone is an extension of your ears and your voice. So now, if I'm eating dinner and the phone rings, I think, well, I don't want my hearing extended right now - I want my hearing to be focused on my husband. It has really helped me clarify and get back to using technology, instead of letting technology use me.
I'm not sure that most emails demand an instant response. I think that the majority of them can and probably should wait for the 9-5 parameters (or whatever it is that you need to set for yourself.) One of my last jobs was in sales and the director of sales did not have a blackberry because she felt that when she was working, she was working hard and when the day was done, nothing was so important that it couldn't wait until the next day. If something was so urgent then the people she needed to talk to could call her. I was so impressed by this considering that in sales, every minute is another dollar. Our culture demands instant gratification in so many areas and I don't think that email response is that different. There are some great suggestions already listed, but I wonder if once you leave the office (unless traveling) you don't check email. Keep work and home separate in that sense. You can do it!
As I am sitting here in my recliner on my DAY OFF reading this post and these ever so helpful comments, I was wondering...
Mark, could I email you a few of my other issues in my life like this one and have you post about them? You have a GREAT blog audience and I have just appreciated the many suggestions that they have extended. And next week's issue is....:-)
Look, I applaud you for opening yourself up like this. We all deal with this. You just have the b....courage to admit it.
I answer the phone on my day off; so I check my emails on my day off. I try to do so during lulls in family time; but I do check, and thus far feel no "guilt".
Different strokes for different folks; I don't think there is a wrong way to handle email or incoming phone calls; like most things (to include devos, prayer, etc) gotta find what works for you...and work it!
As you get older and wiser it will get better. Stephen Covey said something that has stuck with me. Master technology do not let technology master you.
I appreciate the aunthencity, man. It reminds me I'm not alone.
Really been studying alot about things like this, and I think the real danger is when we do try to put a number on things. Maybe your cutoff number included alot of superfluous emails, but maybe your cutoff didn't include that one key person that needed to hear from you.
So, where I'm at on this is "keeping in step with the Spirit" to borrow a Packer phrase. We are capable of incredible things in our flesh, unfortunately, but He is capable of so much more in us for His pleasure.
Maybe there's a magic number, maybe not, but I trust the Spirit's lead over a rule any day.
Truly appreciate your ministry!!!
i am too Mark. i am sure i don't get as many as you, but i am dedicated to stopping it as well.
as much as i personally want to answer them all, I am going with letting my assistant help navigate the storm to free up 1-1.5 hours+ a DAY! ouch.
Mark, I admire you for your sincerity and openness. I feel identified with your confession. As a leader, the effective management of time, priorities and tasks is always a challenge. The email has an active role in our impatient culture where many things has “now, now, now!” as their last name. Many people expect immediate responses because an immediate response is possible thanks to technology. I remember the times when I received phone calls from people saying: “I just sent you an email for you to see it now”. It was confusing because the person could tell me the message at that moment on the phone.
A message that we instantly receive in our inbox doesn’t mean that we need to answer it instantly. Not everything in life is urgent and the email is not either. Think about this for a moment: the email is a bunch of interruptions and distractions that appear in our inbox without invitation. Every time we check our email for a minute we open a door for different images and the immediate distraction affects our agenda and concentration from real, important and critical issues.
A few months ago I read the book Never Check E-Mail In the Morning: And Other Unexpected Strategies for Making Your Work Life Work from the time management guru Julie Morgenstern. I recommend it.
Among the themes that Morgenstern exposes is that reading emails early in the morning distorts your daily plan and these will establish your work agenda that should have been previously planned. For this reason, she suggests for you to read emails during the afternoon and in time blocks so you take advantage of your more productive hours during the morning.
God bless you and don’t give up!!!
Mark...thanks for sharing. I suffer from the same mentality. I feel bad if I don't personally email back and I feel like it needs my attention right then, so I HAVE to email them right then! I think it is good to let go email every once in a while and realize that God can take care of things with or without me. Not that we don't need to take responsibility, but life goes on and God will work no matter where I am. I like your phrase "pray like it depends on God and work like it depends on you." I believe that, but sometimes we just have to give God both so we don't go crazy! Thanks for sharing, your wisdom and ability to share with others make you a great pastor, that I know I look up to.
I've gotten to the point that I check email once a day. The most urgent of requests can be filtered through my virtual assistant and the rest get an auto response from my aweber account. I have 5k+ distributors that are always demanding my time, and in the business world, there is no day off (according to them). So, I came up with a rule so I don't constantly check my email. No email on my phone, no email on my personal days, I read email first thing in the morning for an hour, and after that I'm done.
I've trained the people I work with that this is how I work and they have to accept it. It caused quite a stir early on in the summer, but now I very rarely have any issues if at all. When your inbox says 437 (like mine does right now and no I'm not responding to any of them) from just today, forget about trying to answer them all.
I also do this with my phone. All calls are answered by my virtual assistant and I check in with her every few hours to get a list of the people who called and why they called me. The most important phone calls get returned right away and I filter the rest.
This took me a ton of prayer and a lot of thought since my team means every thing to me and I owe them a good portion of my success, but I like to have a life too.
Godspeed PM!
Terry
I haven't read all of the comments, so there's a good chance someone else has already said this, but...
I've recently taken a FranklinCovey time management class and read the book "Getting Things Done" by David Allen. In both cases, they recommend blocking off a portion of your day for email and not extending beyond that time frame. For instance, say that you're only going to check email from 8 AM until 11 AM daily, and then stay away from email the rest of the day (tell NCC staff to call you if it's urgent). Not sure how practical that is for you, but it's definitely helped me.
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