"This is my son in whom I am well pleased."
I think that one verse, Matthew 3:17, may hold the most important key to parenting. Dads have lots of roles and responsibilities, but I honestly think that passing on a blessing might rank at the top. And it's modeled by the Heavenly Father who said to Jesus: "This is my son in whom I am well pleased." I think this has to rank as one of the most memorable moments in the life of Christ. We assume that Jesus didn't need the same assurances we do, but I don't think that's true. He needed to know that His Father loved him, blessed him, and believed in him.
Our kids desperately need our affirmation. And by affirmation I don't just mean words of blessing. Sometimes the most affirming thing you can do is discipline your kids! It assures them that you care about them. If you didn't care you wouldn't even bother.
Blessing is more than an action. It's an art form. You do everything in the spirit of blessing your kids. So whether you're teaching or hanging or praying or playing--you are blessing them. You want your kids to grow up and feel blessed? They will feel blessed if you bless them!
Do it consistently. Do it creatively. Do it verbally. Do it non-verbally.
Just do it.
I think that one verse, Matthew 3:17, may hold the most important key to parenting. Dads have lots of roles and responsibilities, but I honestly think that passing on a blessing might rank at the top. And it's modeled by the Heavenly Father who said to Jesus: "This is my son in whom I am well pleased." I think this has to rank as one of the most memorable moments in the life of Christ. We assume that Jesus didn't need the same assurances we do, but I don't think that's true. He needed to know that His Father loved him, blessed him, and believed in him.
Our kids desperately need our affirmation. And by affirmation I don't just mean words of blessing. Sometimes the most affirming thing you can do is discipline your kids! It assures them that you care about them. If you didn't care you wouldn't even bother.
Blessing is more than an action. It's an art form. You do everything in the spirit of blessing your kids. So whether you're teaching or hanging or praying or playing--you are blessing them. You want your kids to grow up and feel blessed? They will feel blessed if you bless them!
Do it consistently. Do it creatively. Do it verbally. Do it non-verbally.
Just do it.
5 Comments:
Matthew 3:17 changed my life. When you realize that God loves you like He loves Jesus, it changes you. This is something I'm doing the best to pass on to my girls. I often tell them how much I love them and how pleased I am with them.
Paul
Legacy by affirmation. My parents did that for me and I am doing my best to do that for my four girls.
Legacy by affirmation is key for men as well. Many men did not have fathers growing up. Absent fathers, abusive fathers or no father figure at all. Matthew 3:17 is huge for men this Father's day, not just for men that are dads, but for men in general.
Your Heavenly Father says to you - "you have what it takes!"
Great post... In one of his books, Gordan MacDonald wrote something similar that has always stuck with me. Based on this passage, he said that there are 3 things that every boy/man needs to hear from his father: (1) You're my son. (2) I love you. (3) I'm proud of you.
As I've talked about this with other guys, I'm struck by the number of men who have never heard their dad say, "I love you" and/or "I'm proud of you." May we be liberal in using these phrases with the men in our lives!
Excellent post and comments so far. I just had a conversation yesterday with another church leader who has had to step out of ministry for a while due to dabbling with pornography. His counseling has brought to light how the lack of adequate parental affirmation has a lot to do with his self-image. Not to put all the blame on parents, but imagine if the church could help our fathers either pass on the good affirmation they received or learn how to break the cycle by giving what they never received. What a different generation we could see in our churches and in our communities.
Interesting that God said this to Jesus before He DID His first miracle, etc.
He was pleased with Who He was, not just what He did.
Thin line for most dads.
Thanks.
Grace and Peace,
Another Mark
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